Artistic Spasms

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	Don't expect Sunshine ^{From the Storm}
	Updates on my undead life \| All about your lovely Webmistress... \| Artistic Spasms \| Massive amounts of pictures... \| Medieval Adventures \| Maryland Trip '04 \| Icons \| Back to Start

Yeah yeah, if you don't like poetry, then don't read it. :p I will be probably posting a few poems up here every once in a while. If you would really like to keep up on my poetry, check on my xanga or livejournal.... it's full of stuff like that... Also I apologize for the poor quality of these pictures. They had to be shrunk down quite a bit to fit on this page and to keep you from having to scroll all over the place. I will try to link them so you can click them and see full size versions. Sumimasen!
	Bleed Metaphoircally bled dry Holding onto nothing... Holding the shell of a form That gave me such comfort. No more tears to cry I tried to, but they're gone. Empty, I go on. Something is there For me. I see the little light in my hands. I own my life again. It may not be amazing, But it's MINE. So hold onto the last rope On the strands of my sanity. I Love I Love I Love again. But it is still the same. But I feel happy For the first time in what seems like So long ago.... There is no comfort From those I betrayed But only from My own hands. I Love you. And somehow.... I am ok with that. I am ok if you are happy without me. I am ok, if you are happy. So please, be happy. Just make sure I know Just make sure I am not lost in your life your memory your heart and your love.
Scream Can't you hear my screams? I know that you can! Please come back now! Why do you abandon me...? At home in the dark, cold and alone... I've lost my senses. Didn't I just scream? I can't remember... Fake screams? My emotions are not valid? I'm not human anymore...? I lost memory of this world... When the world lost memory of me. Noone cared though. No one does care. Blood runs down my back. Something's been torn off there. Why do I feel lost? Why am I alone? Lost in darkness.... I forget. Dark Side of the Moon I don't really know, Nor understand Exactly how it is I feel... Strange as the dark side of the moon. It's interesting How different you really are And how things fall away to reveal The dark side of the moon. Yet every night I wished For something impossible Instead of looking right in front of me, There was the dark side of the moon. Why couldn't I see What I had in front of me? Is it really as black as I thought On the dark side of the moon? Have you ever heard Of such a silly thing As the daughter of the gods Who chose to live on the dark side of the moon? Desert Rose There was something to her exotic face, Something in those dark eyes. Somehow I was lost, Remembering what the rain was like. She made me believe in love again, Just by walking by. She never knew my name, But I forgot I was alone in the desert. Lost, so far from home, I was stranded in such a strange land Yet here was something familiar to my eyes. Beauty. Somehow I failed to speak with the wide eyed woman, As she walked away that night, And again I was alone in the Desert, With the memory of a Rose.
	Sad Melody Darkened Angel, please don't cry. I can't stop your pain And I don't know why. Shredded wings And bloodied feathers. Broken hearts And broken tethers. A sad melody Is all we hear. Distoreted with pain, Torment, and tears. I wish you could fly But you bind yourself down In your own blood You endlessly drown. I reach out my hand And beg that you take it. Because without it We both might not make it. Your beauty and blood Are all I see. Your love and tears Are all I need. Darkened Angel Hold my hand. Darkened Angel In Forsaken Land. Darkened Angel Hold me tight Darkened Angel Promised Night.
So this is how it goes So this is how it happens And this is how it goes And this is what I expected Yet you surprised me And I can't stand that I could hurt you And I can't take this pain in my head And I can't let go of other people So I can't move ahead just yet Holding the idea in my head Holding my thoughts inside Holding the cards in my hand Holding the peices on my side of the board. Did you think this wouldn't happen? Did you realize it was inevitable? Because I knew that it would happen Now I'm just not sure what to do. Untitled You mean so much to me Your hand is so close I could just reach... No. And I'll look at you From the couch And my heart will skip A beat. I'll sit here, on the computer Thinking of what to say The next time I see you. I can't. I worry too much If it happens, it happens And there's not much else To it. And I'll hold back a little Since I'm not sure And I can't say what will be Today. Waiting for a ring A never ending wait For you to pick up the phone And I sit waiting patiently... And I hang up. You didn't answer, why would I wait? The next day I called again And I held on the line a little longer And waited to hear your voice And I hung up again. I waited a week, And picked up the phone. I dailed your number, But as I was about to dail The last number, I changed my mind. And then I called the next week, And waited for you to pick up. And waited And waited. And I cried as I hung up the phone. And then 3 weeks later, I gave in and called One Last Time. And you picked up. You sounded so happy To hear from me And suddenly You and I were the most truthful With each other That we had ever been. And I didn't want to hang up. So I called A lot And you didn't mind And you answered. But what if I don't call anymore? What if I call someone else? I'll only end up calling you again. That's how it always is... Isn't it? I'll call you later.
	Katsy Strange as it is, Here we are again. I look over and smile. I remember why I love you so much. Your wit is amazing, You're so damn cute! You have your independence, And you still want to fall back on me... My little sister Is an amazing girl. For those that don't know her, I wish that you did. Intelligent, Precise, Wise, Yet naive... I love her forever, And let's add a day. Bound through stars, we are, Please don't forget that. Above All Pretend this moment will never end. Pretend we'll always be more than just friends. It's possible all we pretend will come true. It's possible only if we both want it to. Hold me tight, like you always do. I'll promise not to let go of you. I'll set aside every reservation and fear If you swear we'll shed no more tears. I think I've found you through it all Into your arms I will always fall. You've brought me back to life again And then made my red blood run. I had lost hope in all of this, But it all came back with your beautiful kiss. I see beauty in your eyes I see it through your dark disguise. I know you disagree, but you are my Angel. There are secrets to me you may never tell. I love your darkness, I love your veiw. But above all else, I will always love you.
Me (Or Duality of Nature) Fake fake fake The world believes I am fake Take take take Some sees that I only take They fail to see How true I'll be To those who truly care. They never knew How much I do For those who are always there. So many parts of me Are simple human qualities I fall easily to mistakes They're not that hard to make. The other side of myself Has a darkness that it tells I see faults in all but some I rarely forgive anyone. I'm torn inside, I'm dark & light. But most I hide Behind the bright side. Running and Hiding Did you ever feel so empty That you thought you forgot to feel? Did you ever think that everything Yes, EVERYTHING, was different now? Nothing is sacred anymore, And yet everything is. Screaming so no one can hear, And crying so quiet that Everyone listens. Feeling forsaken And forbidden. Forbidden to be happy. Ever. Goddess has a plan, and That plan damns me. I hate who I am. I hate who I am destined to be Forever. Forever is a really long time. Nothing but sorrow. Nothing but pain. I'm such a little wimp. What a little wuss. She cries a lot. She whimpers to everyone. Whining, and blubbering When nobody cares. Oh, she's not really hurt, She just wants attention. Poor poor Giselle. Her life sucks, Let's throw her a pity party... I hate you. I love you, But oh do I hate you.
	Self-Destruct Do you really think I'm ugly? Is that really what you see? You only want to think that So that you can hate me. Is everything else around you So badly destroyed That you need to hurt me So your own reality avoid? Is all that I offer Not nearly enough? Love, friendship, compassion, Instead of sex and drugs? Live young and die fast, Is that how it went? Or live fast and die young? It's all under the same tent. I watch you destroy yourselves, And helplessly watch you die. I feel I'm living safe, You think life passes me by. Well, when we're all grown up, And you've lost all these games, We'll see where life got us, And who has really gained. Vampire's Requiem It's haunting me, That beautiful glow from your eyes. I can't esape the pain I felt The day that my lips were stained, and you died. So sweet a sin To look in your eyes, but never touch. I could not profane such a pure thing. I was so careful with you, but not enough. A hunger arose, Not able to keep myself from temptation, I gave into it, destroying such a fragile being. Wishing, within damning, you were the exception. The day you died, My heart failed, and died its second time. I ran away to the hill. Our hill. Your hill. Thet's where you lay now, victim of my purest crime. It's raining today. It reminds me of your eyes that sad day. I had forgotten how beautiful human eyes can be. I can't see them any more, I look away. I will find a way. Somehow I'll figure out how to bring you back. I have eternity to find the answers I seek. This is also an eternity for my soul to crack. Your body crumbles. How did I mange to break all the rules? How is it that you affected me that way? And why is destiny always so cruel? I fell in love. I believed in a forsaken love affair. I believed we could change the rules. I know now, since you lie on that hill, up there. Sarcasm You don't want to hear You turn a cold shoulder. I talk too much? But you run to your soldier. The endless amount Of issues you have. I have to help you But that's only half. Just because he's here Doesn't mean I'm fine. There's a LOT you don't know But you don't have time. So maybe I don't care To tell you all the facts. But if you're so perceptive, Wouldn't you know this "crap?" You don't pay attention, You don't even care!! I want to talk to you But you're never there. Hangout with other friends Make up lame excuses. Leave me to myself So I feel useless.